are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
