You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
