ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
The power of my boobs compel you
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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