The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
We left an ass print on the piano.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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