No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
My feet surprised me
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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