Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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