I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
