brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I bet he comes in French.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i out mim tonsoeep
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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