she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
