I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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