I met the friendliest cop last night
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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