Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
