I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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