So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
