She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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