: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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