it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
