Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I think people are normalizing furries
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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