I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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