Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
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