That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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