Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
