Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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