seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
