Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
