I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
My pussy is not your playground.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Come share oat with me in your robe
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
