you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
