if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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