I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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