Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
