You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize