I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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