It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize