big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
