Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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