i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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