fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
the day after is always just damage control
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize
