She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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