I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
