OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
