Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
