ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
