O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
