why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
