I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
