If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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