No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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