i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
