I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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