I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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